The world we live in is full of dangers. Mothers, to protect their children from these dangers inadvertently attached to the mood of the child's physical and psychological development can harm the mood. This state of anxiety in the mother, which we call ham Evham çocuk, may arise as a lack of self-confidence and introversion. Dr. Reem Neuropsychiatry Center. Mehmet Yavuz shares his views on the subject.
An evident mood may be a sign of anxiety disorder
Worried mothers need to control every step their child takes. They act with the spirit of control, and if they don't, they think that something bad will happen to their child. These thoughts are reflected in the mother's attitude and behavior. If there are endless catastrophe scenarios in the mother's mind, an anxiety disorder can be mentioned. Evhamed mothers often make these sentences that address their concerns; “Oh, be careful.” Ers You fall. ”In It hurts. Anne The mother, who makes these sentences, gives her child the following message:“ Life is dangerous, you are not safe, and anything can happen at any moment. ”
Children take role models of their mothers
A child is under the responsibility of his or her parents until they become individualized and make their own decisions. The process of starting to be a child apart from the mother starts from the age of 3 years. At this age, the child begins to socialize, the parents and the environment begins to get the idea of what life is like. He can choose role models. He observes the environment when choosing a role model. This creates anxious, timid, even cowardly children. Mothers can raise suspicious children who cannot unwittingly individualize, leave the mother's side, find it difficult to make new friends, and have concerns that they have been abandoned when the mother is not with her.
Differences in thought between evident mothers and healthy mothers
Evolutionary mothers distort the possibility of the danger to the child. For example; A healthy mother may also be concerned about the possibility of her child falling down while playing at school. However, a healthy-minded mother can relieve herself by thinking that this is a natural process in the developmental stage. The convinced mother, on the other hand, can match the child's going to school in her own mind and harm the child's head. Every time the child goes to school, he / she suffers as if he / she puts his / her child in danger with his / her own hands, experiences an excessive sense of responsibility or goes to school with the child, waits at school, and frequently warns his / her teachers. Therefore, the minds of the early mothers are busy with images of disaster. The reason for this may be to put aside the other roles in life and focus only on the role of the mother. The attention of these mothers is always on the child. Mi Did he eat? ”, Mı Did he study?”, Mı Did he do his homework? ”, Mu Did he sleep well?”, Sağlıklı Is he healthy enough? Zaman It may return.
Incorrect behavior of parents
The problem of not being able to sleep alone is also high in the children of anxious, anxious and overprotective guardians. Here, the mother exhibits an attitude that is dependent on the child and the child models this behavior of the mother in the same way. It is known that children who have had frequent respiratory infections since their childhood, who have allergies or other health problems are not often separated by their mothers, this behavior reinforces the dependence between the mother and the child, even in good faith, and adversely affects the individualization of the child and the development of trust. In addition, these children often have difficulty in starting daycare and school, and they may experience serious separation anxiety and anxiety. Another behavioral mistake that parents make is triggering children's fears without realizing it. For example; “If you don't sleep, the revenge comes and takes you, if you don't eat, you get weak, you get sick” should not be used.
Able to cope with anxious thoughts
In order to cope with anxiety-laden thoughts and images, vivacious mothers can alternatively produce and focus on a thought or image. For example, these mothers; Um My child has played on the street many times but nothing has happened to him ”and he can also put an image of his children playing happily on the street when he says, ett I taught him things to watch out for on the street. Another thing that mothers can do here is to remember other roles that they have interrupted and try to divert their attention. For example; In this sense, it may be right to turn to sports activities or social responsibility projects and to devote time to yourself. Individuality is lacking here. The child wants to create his own world and lifestyle, but he is not allowed to be overly sensitive. Approaches such as tehlikeli going out dangerous, sitting at home eng prevent the development of a healthy ego. The critical point here is not to harm the child while protecting him and taking precautions to avoid harm to him.